World Cup 2006: What Not to Win

Pictured below: Winner, Worst Possible Way to End a Stellar Career

So sad. Zidane, we know he pinched your nipple and called your sister the whore who is also your mother, but why oh why in the final minutes of your remarkable career as France’s most stylish striker did you decide to settle the matter with the top of your bald head? With a single bad decision, you downgraded yourself from international hero to cautionary tale. Best wishes on salvaging your reputation.  Maybe start with a tearful apology? Works for some people.