My Whole Foods turkey sandwich tastes like… turkey, can you believe it?

June 19, 2007

One scientific reality that I am currently lamenting is the fact that nobody really knows what hormones are or how they work or what they are truly capable of doing. At least thats my impression and my experience, and in the year 2007 isn’t that all that really counts? I feel strongly in my gut that I may, more often than I would like to think about, be more controlled by chemicals in my body than thoughts in my head.

Exhibit A: Senior year

In brief, starting the pill and being anemia do not a happy year make. The effect of the pill is still pretty much unquantifiable, as it varies widely from person to person and I was never particularly conscientious about taking it at the exact same time every single day. So that narrows it down… not at all! Maybe the pill made me crazy, maybe Iraq made me crazy, maybe being just about to graduate made me crazy, maybe a lack of iron in my blood (which creates many of the same symptoms as depression all by itself) did it. The point is, I was crazy. I spent a lot of time and energy trying to not be crazy, with moderate success. Still, it’s hard to know if that is because I just wasn’t good at getting uncrazy or whether there was something physically wrong with me. Who knows? Either way, it was a craptasm of a year in many regards.

Exhibit B: Yesterday

For the former RA’s among us, no, I did not have a plan, but yes, I felt cosmically crappy about almost every single choice I had ever made (notable exceptions being learning to play the oboe, marrying D, making friends with people who have exquisite musical taste). I know everyone has these days. They are normal. But it was just fucking relentless. Everything I looked at wham, there was it’s bad side. The fantasies I generally use to get myself through the library workday, such as moving out of Florida into an apartment with hardwood floors and a location north of Mason-Dixon line, all seemed out of reach and likely to cause doom anyway. I was pretty sure that I had sold myself out in every way possible. I was pretty sure I could feel a mole on my face turning into skin cancer. I do not recommend a day like yesterday to anyone. Neither does Anne Lamott, but she does give one reassurance that they can be lived through, so I’m glad I’ve been in a heavy Lamott phase of late.

So, I help my day out with a few gmail chats and a couple beers and the Lost second season, all seven discs of it, in my hands, and I come to that time of going to Bedfordshire. I have the foggy notion that (TMI alert) it was about time for me to remove my current form of birth control, the ring. I do so, and then I get to thinking, did I wait too long? It turns out I did, but a full week. So instead of using it for three weeks I’ve been using it for a month.

Now, there is no scientific evidence for what I am about to suggest, but it did occur to me that perhaps my relentlessly, atypically miserable day could have had something to do with that little extra week. Come to think of it, the past week had been on a bit of a downward spiral in the absence of any additional external stressors. I mean, nothing really changed. I got home from NYC to a dually employed husband and an acceptable grade on the most recent paper for psycho prof, and the joyous birth of LL (to whom I am rapidly becoming addicted) so why did I spend so much time trying not to cry? Again, there’s no scientific evidence for this and I normally don’t even bother to try and figure out a reason why I feel like crying, but it did seem a little weird, like something that was happening to me from the outside not from the inside.

Exhibit C: My lunch

I took a bite into my sandwich today, the first sandwich fully of the Whole Foods Era, with natural turkey and natural colby jack cheese and organic black pepper on WF baguette. I guess I figured I would taste something different going, since my fare of late has been the cheapest Publix food I can find, but I was genuinely taken aback. It tasted like actual turkey. Like actual food. Like actual something. Could this be related to the fact that natural turkey has no extra hormones of antibiotics attached to it? Of course, it was also better quality in other regards, but my point is, I tasted something more like the real thing and it was a lot better.

So, are there any conclusions here, other than the fact that I really need to stop being a cheapskate on my food supply?

Who knows, certainly not me as usual. But I had a much better day today. I just turned my second of three total library papers for this summer (so just one big headache left, and a few little ones). I have a thought about how to make the shitty first draft of a story I just completed (yay) a little better, and while I’m not sure that it will actually pan out I have the will to at least try it, which is a nice change from 24 hours ago. I’m listening to The Tragically Hip, but that doesn’t feel tragic at all.


One Response to “My Whole Foods turkey sandwich tastes like… turkey, can you believe it?”

  1. Wide Lawn Says:

    Liz, you must never cheap out on food.

    I know that sounds exactly like it could be a line from Eat Pray Love, but I mean it. Of all the advice I have to give you, this will have the most positive effect on your life.

    Buy outfits at the Salvation Army, recycle old everything, take all charity bits of anything anyone wants to give you and never buy a new couch, but for the love of God, never cheap out on food. Even the 18$ bottle of truffle oil is worth it, and especially the good brie. Don’t forget exquisite cheese and chocolate and don’t buy fruit out of season.

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